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It was able to know the one that seemed to be the reason why it met medium, it met another medium in addition, and I returned to the parents' family. However, the doubt has been springing gradually in me. Did I get sick of dizziness and staggering why?Was it made to return to this land to which it had despised it by the death about why?Why does a maternal ancestor interfere in me?This doubt has become serious while spending many days. The body doesn't have the recovering sign at all. It is usual in the face. Strength training can be usually done. However, the operation "Walk" that was sure to be able to be done very naturally was very difficult. It became a tottering step even if there was no equilibrium feeling, and it was going to walk usually, and I always indoors felt the uneasiness that seemed to be faced with something. Driving the car is more miserable. It hesitated even to drive the distance of 2km because there was no equilibrium feeling, and was not a perspective either occasionally. The distance of 5km or more was almost done at the risk of one's life. To measure the distance feeling first of all when beginning to drive, a desperate effort is needed. In addition, it becomes desperate to make it not stagger, and the steering wheel is grasped. When the rearview mirror is seen, the following car that seems to feel danger is far away. It progressed, and it was finally a pattern that driving became difficult in Frafra while driving while making an effort like this. For the tile bur and Frafra that came to shop the so on and about 3km apart and super to progress, and to return once, it had felt horror. Greasy sweat was stickiness in the palm though it managed to return and it attached. A serious dislike was surrounded by this land. Having thought that you may live in this land after it had moved in to about the end of the elementary school did not have nothing. It was experienced to receive bullying to several in the junior high school age, and to be disregarded from the greater part of men of the class. Because the party who bullies it teams up as a group thoroughly to yakuza, the hand cannot be put out alone. It came to do combative sports for that back, and it came to research the technology that killed the person by bare-handed or the nearby one ardently though it was a considerably severe experience. However, the hand was not able to be put out because the law was scared this time when strengthening. Man with a good head is disadvantageous. .. The problem at an intellectual level is this time brought up when entering the high school. It became more serious when it entered the high school, and it came to consider the university examination at the time of the elementary school though it was ..level gap.. aghast. Whether the number of the high schools of those who pass the university is 100 people a year, and has one person The University of Tokyo during year though entered the best school of going on to school without studying through the junior high school age at all in the region or not?It came to study for myself as a body that aspired after first class National Universities in the Chubu region that seemed living nearby of father and the relative, and possible going to school it almost disregarding the class in the environment it did not suffice at the level of the class of the high school at all, and without a good cram school either. After all, it couldn't help despising to some teachers with the high school though it put straight in the university of the wish. The active service thinks passing in room in The University of Tokyo when keeping living in land where it lived for a long time before it ..parents.. divorces. In the companion relation, the level gap is always felt through the junior high school high school, and it is smarter than I or man who trowed is one original person slightly. Such a desire went out or it floated from surroundings like seemed being natural. Was it made the return of it to land without such good memories why? There is not money because it came back either. neither the return of the physical condition, there is no work, and exist little sentenceAnger has been springing all around gradually in the situation of blocking. I was made angry very much because a maternal ancestor had called me. The eldest son did not take over the house, and mother's lineage was said that I had been called back to hold ancestor's festival to stop it as the state on a reverse-edge continued from medium. Whenever reconsidering back, I came to feel the word amusing only though medium meant the word of the soul as it was. Younger brother descends below, and the uncle for the me has two boys though mother becomes an eldest child because the elder brother died young. Therefore, if ancestor's festa is made to be done, there is no reason of which going to that comes to me in the stripe, and if I hold the festival, only it becomes a reverse-edge. By the way, the obligation of the festa is not here because my father is a second son, and eldest son's uncle has two boys either. It is considerably amusing. It is sure not to become a reason why I am called though it is away from both and parents' familys. Especially, on the maternal side. It need not be this separately land, and it doesn't become the reason putting of the living in this difficult land to find employment though it saw though it thinks by doing the reduction interpretation to looking after parents. There must however not be right to bring to the point of keeping sick for that besides it and this having the strongest ability (In the point of spiritual, intellectual struggle ability) of maternal cousins (Is trowed) though it was thought that it had been pulled. It was convinced that this was planned what because it had never absolutely returned to this land if not becoming a situation that was not able to work by getting sick. Even if it was a god, it was not possible to permit. There must not be right to move as voluntarily and liked to the point where the person is made a sickness. Anger has been gradually becoming serious. It was conscious being not able to do anything to boil down in the situation that could do nothing but exist in the house. However, it is not though it does very. It is not suitable in the body of penniless though it is likely to become a gas pulling out if it is possible to do even by the play circumference either. The frustration collected. After all, isn't it ancestors' egoisms?Some day, it came to think so. It doesn't joke. Anger exploded. It was frequent as troublesome etc. ..seeing (In the mind).. of this sides with food callus. The target of anger was suitable for the god. Because this was a string of the bit of hope, in the body that was not able to work that put the last hope on Rot 6 that had continued to buy it for a long time, it was made to hope if this was hit, and it was declared that nothing had been done any longer, and it went out of this land some time if coming off (In the mind). Anything was made not to be done as it was a long-cherished declaration because it had come off like seemed being natural the lot at the date that I had specified. It was made not to go in the Shinto shrine in the land and the Shinto shrine in the prefecture. It was completely stopped though a shrine had been visited as long as time permitted if there was a Shinto shrine on the way before. It was declared that it never visited a grave, and did not go. It only reluctantly cleaned it because it did not try to clean the grave when there was grandfather's law main point though the uncle went home once. It was a line because it had felt familiarity in the grandfather and the uncle who had died young where it was able to be transferred at least. The Frafra disease became awful again, and I could not help resigning because of the remainder only in January though it began to work at the factory of the major company in local through the temp agency in the autumn of the year. Rehabilitation came to be received in a certain hospital, and afterwards, the therapeutic gain was not obtained by the a half in January, and it entered the stagnating state though a line light had opened to the fight with a long Frafra disease at last. It was done to hit on by chance and to move the bone for myself, and came to recover after that and steadily on a certain day that suffered and was tired. In addition, the state of the body hitting on by chance, moving the bone, and improving continued several times. I thought that God's good graces about this though it was difficult to make touched of the mind at this time detailed. As for the experience of breaking the idea made fixed, and curing the body by a new method, I felt god's help given there because it understood if it was able not to be done only by own power. Hostility toward my god disappeared. The desire that this sickness was one program has strengthened at the same time, too. It is because of seeming that it is necessary to have lived in the large city in the Chugoku region now, it doesn't return to this land, and it doesn't meet medium if this sickness doesn't exist. The nature of two years or about three years did until recovering somehow when it got sick, and I felt the secret code as for improving at this time. Everything of the new year from the end of the year was able to be spent by such a thing comparatively in calm feelings. However, there is no one as weak as man. It doesn't become even if a new year begins ..the remainder of life.., and anger to the existence pushed in has a lump in one's throat to the furnace and this re-land in the situation that finding employment is uncertain. I become the big enjoyment that ancestor's anger retaliates at any rate about the god when it is to tell the truth large also now, and I die. Anyway, if oneself programmed it by the clarification of everything when dying, it will be convincing, and will give a proper repaying if pulled by the egoism of the ancestor or other existence. If it is not allowed to go freely also at a level low as for a high level, it doesn't become it for that. Therefore, it is first training. It is a frame of mind "Do not care" recently though is when ..way above.. thinking. I want to rely on, and after all, the ancestor soul in which a powerful descendant can hesitate will become, and will not come if there is no power only of it. After all, it will separate from the soul with different level if becoming the time of Ascension. Many are dragged by the souls who died in the much more in a different place by going and when he or she has devotion, even near relatives and the relative who is alive have not suitable either coetaneous now. It is called that it misses it if devotion is thrown away early when Wacacocorota is chanted every morning and it doesn't go up now. The hint to stand voluntarily shall be called presented feelings of though the action has not been positively caused any longer. It is oh dear because of the desire after all that it is the best shortcut if said the insolence though no do be known so. Because it is meaningless even if the string is hung down as long as the vector is not changed. It hesitates, and suffering is what own devotion invents after all. Because there is not saving if it is not thrown away. After all, "Save" is what oneself does. Saving comes not to come if it is not noticed though it relies on gods and Buddha though relied on the descendant. Do not it reach at the level to which saving is received? The paradox around here quite : though practice is difficult even if it understands difficultly. Word "Free mind" does and the nature like one key word does. It was thought that leaving tracks of the mind became other people's study, wrote, and you took the shape of addition though you may ..all aspects.. rewrite this paragraph. Heart Search 
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